Friday, February 29, 2008

Terry Richardson = Scary H.R. Nerd Riot

This is what you'll find in the pages of Vogue recently.

In the image, a girl is putting on scarlet lipstick in close vicinity to a pair of belted jeans and a white t-shirt. One can only assume that a male resides inside of these clothes. She looks at the camera with a kind of shocked expression, like she's been caught in the midst of mischief. It doesn't take a dirty mind to imagine that in the photographer's (meaning Terry Richardson's) fantasy, she is about to give this guy head. The image is supposed to be shocking and offensively sexy.
Really, it's just sad.

A dirty old man recreates his sexual fantasies using women who are way too young and hot for his sleazy old-man cock, and he gets away with it because we're all so sick of political correctness. True, the age of PC is on the decline and few will miss it, but TR crosses some other kind of line. He's basically a pedophile who seduces girls with money and fame instead of candy (his Molester Glasses aren't a product of trend) . Sure, these young women should know better, but even their complicity doesn't excuse Richardson's slimy m.o.

Notice that he has signed this photo, as an artist would. TR probably thinks he's a modern day Manet (the guy who painted the prostitute so she looked a little two-dimensional, which caused a big scandal in the art world), but he's no artist. His artistic formula amounts to "Peeping Tom meets Shock and Bra." It's predictable, creepy, and most of all, pathetic.

I hope he has some life-altering experience and ends up as one of those crazy guys shouting "Repent Sinner, Jesus Saves" through a megaphone on the fringes of Times Square. The young girls will giggle as they walk by, secretly hoping that someone will recognize how hot they are and offer to make them famous if they take their clothes off for the camera.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Rebels with a Cause

OK, who wants the internet to be more like TV, where money makes the decisions about who makes noise and what gets seen while the crazy, subversive feedback is relegated to late-night spots on cable (I'm thinking TV Party, not Wayne's World)?

If you couldn't guess who, I'll tell you: the internet profiteers, namely Comcast, AT&T, and Verizon. Why? Cuz they're going to be swimming in the green stuff once they get the FCC to act in their favor -- and let's just say that kind of move wouldn't be unprecedented.

Fortunately, our friends in the House of Congress are trying to pass a bill protecting net neutrality. You can help (it's easy!) by sending a virtual letter to your designated congressional representative.

Don't say you don't know who your representative is: if you go to Save the Internet, it'll figure it out for you, and fast. Yup, the magic website sends a message and tells you who it's getting sent to.

Tip: once you find out, memorize the name of your rep. That way, when you're debating your right-wing father about this or another issue, he can't write you off because you don't even know who's making decisions on your behalf.

Another tip: you should always know who's making decisions on your behalf, especially if you don't agree with their overall moral stance. If you consider yourself an anarchist or a revolutionary, the need to know this stuff doubles. You need to be aware of who you're up against. Besides, no one respects a lazy rebel -- but if people can tell you know what you're speaking about, it's easier to change their minds.

Good Luck.

Sunday, February 17, 2008

. . . paint on walls . . .

Friday, February 15, 2008

teens in uniform:
[an anthropological study of minors on the Lower East Side]

In school, kids of the LES have explicit dress codes: no jeans, collared shirts, no hats, etc. But there's an unspoken dress code for any time not under the watchful gaze of teachers and principals. On the way to school, the journey home, and whenever they can get away with it in between, teens almost universally wear jeans. In school -- generally only after the teacher demands -- they pull a pair of oversized slacks over the offending denim . Even then a few choose to refrain from zipping up the second layer of pants, so they walk around looking like they're in the middle of a striptease.

As you can see, guys are still rockin' the falling-down-jeans aesthetic and slightly askew baseball cap that have been popular for over ten years. They're trying to make these styles timeless. Things that have changed: brighter colors (note hot-blue jacket) and backpacks are now worn on both shoulders. North Face is the brand of the day for both backpacks and coats.

On the ladies its skinny jeans and boldly patterned, princess-sleeved coats. Sneakers on the feet, preferably 80s-bright colors. For jewelry, dangling earrings and large hoops, lots of "gold." The backpack is again NF -- generally JanSport is acceptable, but not as widely acclaimed.

Friday, February 08, 2008

. Melody Lanes .

I could annoy everyone by writing something here that'd you'd see in a magazine -- you know, "Whatever her score on the lanes, she gets a strike for style!" But I'll try to refrain (though the astute reader will accuse me of doing anyway). In any case, nice ensemble. The belt, scarf and stockings make perfect accents to the little red dress. One question: how did she foresee the palate of her rented bowling shoes?

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

Awesome Day!
[field trip : grand finale]

Alright kids, field trip's over.

There's no more to see here.

Seriously, go home.

Monday, February 04, 2008

. . . field trip : day 2 . . .

That fairy coming in for a landing had a secret message to relay, but the tricky print on the dress made him miss her shoulder. He fell hard, forgetting the information, but we gave him some wine and procured the directions to Peter Pan's hideout -- so we're even.

Tune in tomorrow for final episode of this style adventure.

Sunday, February 03, 2008

field trip!

. . . down Penny Lane, across the Seven Seas, and
into the enchanted wardrobe of a style child . . .

to be continued . . .

Friday, February 01, 2008

: Bleeker Street :

These outfits brought to you by gentrification.

Call me a right-wing conspirator, but I must observe: a few short decades ago Bleeker Street was just a faster way to say "whores and junkies" (and not of the romanticized variety you see in magazine ads circa 2008). Now stylefolk such as these two roam the subway platforms.

It can only mean one thing: Giuliani is the lovechild of Superman and Jesus after all.